I don’t trust people who don’t drink. There simply must be something wrong with them. There is no way on earth I am going to believe that they simply don’t like it.

These are invariably people who have had serious problems with alcohol, either themselves directly or someone very close to them. In which case it can at least be explained.

I mean fancy going out for a drink and not having one. Or imagine going out for a romantic dinner and sticking to water. Worse still, going to a fun party and drinking 7Up all night.

Oh no no no that’s not for me. I want to come home after a stressful day, strip off, sit down in front of the tele and reward myself a nice whisky on ice. I want to run around the garden on a hot summer’s day only to finally go indoors to cool off and quench my thirst with a lovely ice cold beer. A great meal may only be fully appreciated if accompanied by a good bottle of wine. And I cannot think of anything better to celebrate that big birthday than a fine bottle of champagne.

The word food is usually immediately followed by the word drink. Food and drink, food and beverage, eat and drink, dine and wine. One does not go without the other, in a similar way that husband implies wife and wife implies husband, or brother implies sister and vice versa.

Eating good balanced food while drinking only water and juice is like drinking beer, wine and whisky only with bread or plain rice all of your life.

And when you think of the fantastic array of alcoholic drinks readily available, there simply isn’t any excuse to abstain. Beer, wine and spirits have all been an integral part of our Western culture since time immemorial and more so in our religious culture as well. Alcohol has been largely produced and peddled by monks and clerics and is greatly intertwined with so many religious customs and ceremonies, starting from daily mass. It also holds a sacred symbolic meaning. It used to be served to servicemen in the army and navy, given to patients in hospitals, used to revive people in distress, to launch ships, to celebrate victory in sporting events, it is still included in certain medicines and has largely influenced our lives for the last two thousand years.

So who on earth do these people think they are to arrogantly ignore such long standing tradition! You shouldn’t be ashamed of being a drinker, non drinkers should be ashamed. Celebrate your drinking status in grandeur, for you are the norm not them.

To drive the point home further, it has also been proven over and over again that alcohol in ((small)) quantities is even beneficial to the health and that people who drink a ((small)) amount daily tend to live longer than those who don’t drink at all.

I believe that this must have been by far the very biggest and most outstanding medical discovery of all time. To have even medicine and science condone drinking, for me at least, was a dream come through.

So I am happily settled into my favourite, well informed and somewhat connoisseur practices with regards to my drinking habits. In the very rare occasion when I do have a drink before noon, such as traveling, having a luxury late breakfast in a top hotel, etc., then it can only be one of two things – champagne or bloody mary, both excellent at the times you are not meant to drink. Oh and bloody mary can also visually pass for tomato juice, so it has many advantages in the morning, especially if drinking it in public places.

And for those who might be scratching their heads trying to remember, here goes : vodka, tomato juice, worcester sauce, tabasco, slice of lemon, ice and the final very important ingredient, celery salt. Yep, celery salt! And it makes all the difference, trust me. I also love adding a sprig of fresh basil… yummy! Naturally there are many other versions available, as is the one with salt and pepper, which personally I find futile and even a bit detrimental if you are following the said recipe above.

At lunch time, or when flying, a lovely gin and tonic will never go amiss. And the secret of a great G&T starts with using a very large glass, simply full of ice to the very top. You also have to use freshly opened fully fizzy tonic and not a bottle your great grandmother opened before the war. Chuck in a large slice of lemon or lime partially squeezed for that added flavour and if you want one finished to perfection, throw in a few fresh mint leaves for good measure.

With my meals I naturally drink wine. But before comes the famous aperitif, of which there are so many. This can vary from a simple glass of prosecco, a Campari soda or better a Campari gin soda, a dry white port is lovely, as is a Pernod with ice and loads of water in Summer, so refreshing.

As for wine, believe it or not I still believe that the most basic of pairing between food and wine is necessary. So yes a crisp white wine does accompany fish infinitely better than a full bodied red, which on the other hand is unbeatable with red meat. But then again everyone is entitled to their own opinion. And in the same way that anyone has the right to put ketchup on fresh fish or seafood or brown sauce on ice cream, because it is their opinion and it isn’t illegal, people have all the right to muddle up their wines with their food.

And if anyone is thinking that I am being old fashioned, then they really have no idea and they can thoroughly enjoy their new popular ‘anything goes’ approach to ignorance. Yes there is certain red wine that goes with fish, as is a slightly cooled gamay grape red for example. But even this doesn’t come close to a lovely chilled young new world sauvignon blanc, be it Chilean or from New Zealand. Now if you simply cannot have white wine because it upsets your stomach or makes your nipples sore or something, then that is fine. But nobody on this earth is ever going to convince me that a robust full bodied red goes well with fish or seafood. If still in doubt check out the equally unlikely food combinations I mentioned above, as wine should match food in exactly the same way as certain foods match other foods.

Yes and the same goes with champagne. You hear many saying that they prefer prosecco or cava to champagne and that’s fair enough. Again everyone has a right to their opinion. It is obvious that there still unfortunately exist those who would prefer mixing Brunello with 7UP or even Coke and they too have a right to their opinion. But in reality those who like any type of sparkling wine but not champagne are those who have not yet fully developed their taste in such beverages. For champagne is simply the best and finest and highest quality type of sparking wine around. As we all know it is simply called champagne because it is produced in the Champagne region of North Eastern France.

Now admittedly not all champagne is fantastic. And many sparkling wines from other countries such as certain Spanish cavas are truly excellent. But before you blurt out obscenities such as oh champagne is so overrated and this cava is much better, look properly at the label. You will see that if your sparking wine is truly of good quality, it is in fact produced in exactly the same way as champagne and bears the insignia of ‘methode champenoise’ or ‘methode traditionelle’, simply meaning that everything was done to the smallest detail to imitate true champagne. For champagne is subject to the most stringent regulations and criteria and it can only be of a very high standard. It is therefore the ultimate and finest of sparkling wines. Other types of bubbly are usually a bit fizzier and slightly sweeter, which in terms of sparkling wines are not particularly desirable attributes, but which for the untrained tongue are more pleasing in a liebfraumilch/7UP sort of way.

Opinions are fine and I am free to believe that my Lada is better than my neighbours Ferrari, or that my 12 year old son sings better in the shower than Joseph Calleja. But really and truly this only shows my ignorance in the subject of cars and song,

But let us continue. So a nice, floral, crisp, elegant and fresh new world sauvignon blanc with fish and seafood. A medium red with chicken and pork, such as a Barbera d’Alba or a Sardinian Cannonau. And a full, powerful, tannic, yet balanced red with red meat such as a Medoc or a Chateauneuf du Pape.

After the meal it is of course time for the lovely digestivo, liqueur or after dinner drink, whatever you like to call it. A tawny port is great as is notably in winter a cognac, or an armagnac or even a calvados. But malt whiskies too make excellent after dinner drinks and my favourites are the phenolic peaty ones such as Laphroaig, Ardbeg and Lagavulin.

There are so many more truly fascinating tipples which seem to perfectly encapsulate a moment in time. In winter mulled wine is divine, as can be a Pimms in warm weather. So many great cocktails such as a mojito, margarita, caipirinha, or long island iced tea.

But the moral of the story can only be one. In spite of my fascination and attraction to alcohol, I still profess marked self-restraint. You can love something without abusing of it and by indulging with a dose of control.

I have always made it a point to often abstain for several consecutive days for no reason, other than to show myself who’s boss. And in general I never touch it before evening, unless we are hosting at home or going out. So I have always managed to stave off any type of addiction or dependence, ensuring that I can continue enjoying a drink.

And rather than repeat that so commonly abused catch phrase called ‘moderation’, I by far prefer to say ‘know your own limits’. For moderation is a very vague concept that is so relative in itself. What is moderate, is it 1 drink, 2, 6 or 10? Should the quota be the same for say a 100 kilo man as it is for a 50 kilo woman? Even our own tolerance varies widely from day to day, let alone that of different individuals. In fact our level of tolerance in everything differs greatly. My tolerance for example for watching Maltese TV programmes such as Xarabank is close to nil. While I have heard of certain people who can watch for several minutes at a time, although I find it very hard to believe. So we are all different in every way and the way alcohol effects us definitely varies greatly from one person to another. I know those who can have 15 drinks and are still pretty sober and those who after just one or two can barely function at all.

So know your own personal limits, and even the different limits you can sense on each different day. Enjoy drinking for it is truly a wonderful thing, based on so much thought and science and culture and expertise. But it must always be you who chooses to reach out for that bottle and not the bootle reaching out for you.