A deep and academic analysis of the choice of people’s profile pics based on gender…
Have a giggle and most certainly take it all with a massive pinch of salt!
WOMEN
Holding their tongues out are desperate attention seekers
Well cropped around the face means a disappointing body
Sexy poses are fun seeking individuals
The ones with their partner are always tempted to find another
Family pics are tight assed and well passed it
Wedding photos are still truly in love
Holding hands with their boyfriend, always fantasize about others
Holding hands with their girlfriend are obviously gay
Photoshopped images of their face are unconfident
The ones with their kids are usually the hottest, milf heaven beckons
The hottest are usually fake and are men
The ones with hats are cool and stylish
Those with food and drinks are seeking approval
And those with cars and bikes just don’t give a fuck
The ones with the dogs are unattractive and the ones with the cats are overweight
Those with inanimate objects don’t give a shit
Those with churches and holy statues are best avoided
Flags and slogans denote sickly obsessions
With sunsets and sunrise, you’re a romantic totally lost in your dreams
Holding a book or reading, you’re a power woman in search of your next lesbian lover
Charlie’s and rainbows are nonconformist conformists
And finally those sitting on a weird blue armchair holding an iPhone must first undergo vaginoplasty (ouch!)
MEN
Holding their tongues out just don’t give a shit
Well cropped around the face means a vain and pretentious man
Sexy poses are wannabe gay
The ones with their partner are always tempted to find another
Family pics are sad unimaginative individuals
Wedding photos still have to come out of the closet
Holding hands with their boyfriend are obviously gay
Holding hands with their girlfriend are mostly not gay, but weekends don’t count…
Photoshopped images of their face, are gayer than gay
The ones with the kids, have even given up fantasizing and flirting
The hottest are usually dumb and insecure
The ones with hats are gay
Those with food and drinks are fat slobs
And those with cars and bikes are sad obsessive creatures
The ones with the dogs are relaxed and happy and the ones with the cats are gay
Those with inanimate objects are making a statement
Those with churches and holy statues are best avoided
Flags and slogans denote sickly obsessions
With sunsets and sunrise, you’re very close to the end
Holding a book or reading, you’re a pompous asshole
Chalie’s and rainbows are nonconformist conformists
And finally those sitting on a weird blue armchair holding an iPhone are simply fucking amazing