We attended a morning concert at the Manoel Theatre and nine of us had already decided to head straight to lunch immediately afterwards. I was assigned the dubious honour of selecting and reserving a restaurant for the occasion. A task which always comes with a certain amount of responsibility.

So I tried to weigh up all the options sensibly and finally opted for Cockney’s, for a number of reasons. It is located very close and within easy walking distance from the theatre. It is large and spacious and can very easily accommodate such a table, whereas so many restaurants In Valletta are small and cosy when dining for two, but would feel rather poky for a large table. Because it has an extensive al fresco dining area, which is so much nicer at lunchtime than being stuck inside. And perhaps most of all, because it offers a splendid view of Marsamxett Harbour and the surrounding towns, which can only greatly compliment any meal.

A couple in our party were also heading back to Sliema by ferry immediately afterwards, so this was also the perfect location for them, as it is located exactly where the ferry berths. So as one can see, I really put on my thinking cap for this one.

As we all had our priorities right, we started off by first ordering our wines. I can never understand people who arrive at a restaurant and who then choose to sit there for ages chatting and looking at the menu and thinking what they might eat, without first having ordered their wine.

We went for La Cala Vermentino di Sardinia by Sella Mosca, which as expected was a pale yellow, elegant and supple white wine, with crisp yet unaggressive underlying tones of acidity. As for red we selected the Simonsig Pinotage, which is a nicely perfumed, raspberry fruity and ever so lightly spicy South African favourite.

The menu consisted of fairly ordinary and unexceptional items, but there is nothing wrong with that, and provided that a restaurant offers a good standard of fare, it does not always have to be imaginative and out of the ordinary. Many people like to go for the good old favourites, provided that they are well prepared.

What was a bit more concerning, was the bold and inappropriate mention on the first page of the menu saying “Everything is cooked to order so please allow an appropriate waiting time” – a very outdated approach, I must say, especially for this category of restaurant which is not poised to produce magnificent works of art for dishes, but standard run-of-the-mill fare. I must admit that I cringed a bit when I say this, because if there is something I loathe at restaurants it’s waiting ridiculous times to be served.

Long gone are the days when you spent hours at table with long pauses between courses. In today’s dining world you might want to chat and drink before the meal and usually even more so afterwards, but once you place that food order, service is expected to be brisk and continuous and yes, including between starters and main courses. Not rushed of course, but few these days want to wait more than say ten to 15 minutes between courses. Trends change and providers must change with them. And the trend is very much not to give long pauses as in times gone by.

So seeing such a warning so prominently placed on their menu came as quite a shock. It is obvious and to be expected that everything is cooked to order, rather than shipped in from Sliema on the ferry in troughs and buckets on alternate weeks of the month! And then after all, in spite of this alarming disclaimer, and in spite of the fact that the restaurant was busy and that we were a fairly large table, the waiting times were more than acceptable. So that did turn out to be quite a false alarm.

Moving on the the food, there were of course a variety of starters and on the whole, all were of a good satisfactory standard. I had the Caprese Salad which was delicious and prepared with excellent mozzarella which I swallowed down rather enthusiastically. I was told that the spaghetti vongole was nice but just slightly too salty and that the penne with salmon and shrimps was most enjoyable even if ever so marginally overcooked. The deep fried breaded goat’s cheeselets were pronounced lovely, while the fresh mussels were average.

For mains several of us had rabbit which was fine, although I believe it could have been a bit more tender and succulent. My guess is that it needed more slow cooking to render it more pleasant. The grilled chicken breast was well enjoyed while the grilled calamari was tender but not remarkable.

Some had desserts, in the form of cassatellas and ice creams which were very pleasant, being tasty yet relatively light.

The food overall was by no means spectacular but it certainly was adequate and acceptable. The service was what I would term as uncoordinated and largely lacking attention. We were on two occasions brought the wrong wine, and on several others served both food and beverage items which were meant to be taken to other tables than ours. The style was a bit careless and inattentive, until towards the end of the meal it simply fizzled into a sad no server in sight situation.

One thing I find most annoying with big tables, is that not only do they not take note of individual placing when taking the order, but that servers come out with food, hold their head up high and shout out into the distant horizon, well above everyone’s heads and sphere of attention, expletives such as “Chicken, Chicken”, “Beef, Beef”, at the top of their voices. This only adds to the general overall noise which in turn simply makes everyone talk between themselves even louder, while subconsciously trying to block off their annoying yells.

The most effective method, if they still haven’t worked out how easy it is to take note of who ordered what in the first place, is the exact opposite to the one described above. It is to lower themselves towards the seated customers, look at them directly in the eyes and therefore addressing them personally, rather than speaking to the wind, and asking calmly and ideally softly, so clients actually have to stop talking between themselves to listen attentively, “is the chicken for you sir?”, and the whole table would stop to listen and would even help them out and direct them as to who ordered what.

But in spite of these small inconveniences it was still a good lunch and the positive by far outweighed the less positive. And most of all, based on my initial reasoning, the spectacular view did a lot to subdue the mind, feed the patience and happily expel any small rising frustrations.

We would gladly return to Cockney’s, especially on such a pleasant blue skied day.